Thursday, November 5, 2009

How to spot a Hobbit



This is your typical Hobbit. This one seems to be stealthily seated in the lazy boy, people around don't even notice. This particular Hobbit's name is Benjamin Clonchkin son of Gaffer Clonchkin.

Hobbits are simple folk. Small people with hairy feet, they are not cut out for adventure and prefer to laze about and eat (and smoke and drink in Benjamins case).

Hobbit's live in holes (suncrest is basically a hole). No going upstairs for the hobbit: bedrooms, bathrooms, cellars, pantries (lots of these), wardrobes (he had whole rooms devoted to clothes), kitchens, dining-rooms, all were on the same floor, and indeed on the same passage.

Humans will scarcely catch a glipse of a hobbit. They can hear humans from a mile away, and scurry off into some hole. To you and me, their footsteps would be like that of a mouse or rabbit, or something of the sort.


They are curious creatures.

Very curious indeed.


Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The Boss: A Tribute



RIP

It is said that Bosses are naturally immortal, and remain unwearied by age. Bosses can recover from wounds that would kill mortal men but can die of grief or weiriness.

A short event line of Boss:

  • Sat at the right of of Eru Ilúvatar during Ainulindalë
  • Entered Eä with Manwe
  • Created the Pilantiri
  • Fought Ungoliant, almost saving Telperion during the Darkening of Valinor
  • Came to Middle- Earth with Feanor to help fight Morgoth
  • Struck the final blow at Dagor-nuin-Giliath
  • Rescued Feanor near Eithel Sirion
  • Left the Noldor and went to Fangorn to live with the Ents
  • Went to Khazad- dum to kill Balrogs that had been in hiding for 5 millenia
  • Killed a Balrog on the peak of Zirak- Zigil
  • Fell into shadow, and soon returned as Boss the White
  • Destoroyed the One Ring
  • Moved to Ohio
  • November 22, 2009- Unforeseen death of Boss

See you in the Halls of Mandos Boss


RIP

I'll probably live here someday

Monday, November 2, 2009

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Casting for a post WR movie (Scourge of the Shire, etc.)


So when i was in Scotland this year I found his guy in Edinburgh. I though he would do great for the part when the Gandalf, Galadriel, and the rest of the returning crew find Saruman and Wormtounge on the streets, living as beggars. All this guy needs to do is work on his beard a little bit and he'd do just fine.

But really, why wasn't the Scourge of the Shire in the LotRs movies? I'm told that they were originally planning on making them, but for some reason terminated their creation. I think that this is one of the best parts in the books. That is my one big critisizm for the movies. Well, i was also kind of pissed that Saruman got killed off so early. But if the Scourge happened, i suppose he would have to be alive.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Today someone asked me "why didn't the eagles just fly the ring to mount doom"?




You know what buddy? Fuck you.

The book would be like 10 pages long.

Anyways, even eagles can die. They wouldn't get very far without "fell- beasts" or the Silent Watchers serving them.